Saturday, April 25, 2009
How many of you blog surf? I do. I'm not on facebook because I'm sure I would surf/stalk there as well. Here's what happens and what I need to be aware of.
I start out innocently checking on a few blogs that I read regularly. Then, I start clicking on comments, bouncing around from blog to blog. Sometimes I run into people that I know (that's weird!) sometimes I just lurk. You know what happened today? Something that is rather dangerous. I started to feel inadequate. I HATE when I feel like that. I ended up in Virginia on some woman's front porch that she had just made over (it was very nice) and suddenly became very sad about the front porch that I have. I have one of the sweetest little houses ever, little sweet front porch. However, you know what else I have? Three little people. Three little people that love boxes. Three little people (4 Monday-Friday)that like boxes and playdough. Three little people that like boxes, playdough and walking THROUGH the screen door...like, through the screen. I live in a very blooming place and so it's white with a yellow tint. Guys, it's a mess. All of a sudden all that I do wasn't good enough because my porch, well, it sucks. I know that sweet lady has no intentions of her blog making me feel bad. I'm sure I'll find my way back there someday when I'm all grown up. What happens is we start poking our noses around everyone else's space (it's way fun...I know) and then we aren't good enough cooks, photographers, parents, wives, shoppers, cleaners...you name it. I love, love, love the internet. I love that there are people I don't even know that have taught me so much. What I don't love is how the enemy often uses it against me so that I feel like nothing I do is good enough. Several verses come to mind (I'm doing this off the cuff...they may be off a little) Micah 6:8, "He has shown thee, Oh man, what is good and what the Lord requires of thee, but to do justly, love mercy and walk humbly with your God." It's KJV cause it's a song! Another one says that we shouldn't compare ourselves by ourselves because when we do that, we aren't wise.
So, I'm supposed to be cleaning up while the three kids I have are sleeping because we are having one of our favorite Teams over for dinner and here I sit, thinking that I should, instead, set the porch on fire and start from scratch. I am so very thankful that there are people that can do makeovers for the rest of us to learn from. Right now, however, the only thing that's getting a makeover is me. God continues to refine me and make me more like His precious Son. So, if you come over, you may see my front porch and feel better or worse about yourself. Either way, I hope that when you enter my home you find yourself in a place of grace and that you'll come back.
I feel like I must be clear (being misunderstood is an idol of mine...I'm a dirty sinner, I know) I love seeing how people have changed and made their things beautiful. I want to learn from them. Sometimes, I just have to stop surfing and start thanking because what I have is pretty great too.
Friday, April 24, 2009
For those of you interested, I just posted on my other blog, Harvest Classical Academy...after a really long time. I can't figure out why the comments don't work...but, thought I'd mention it. Have a great day! I'll be back with some cold water as soon as time allows...well, maybe sooner than that!!!
Friday, April 10, 2009
"Dad, I'm not quite sure why, but I just don't think it's wise for us to make the trip. I wish we could come, but I just don't think it's best."
This was a conversation I had a couple of months ago regarding flying down to visit my Dad and Pam in Naples. We went as a family last year and we had one of the best vacations ever! So, it was sad when I had to decline an invitation for this year. I told Mike, I just don't know why, but I just don't think it's best. I would have had to fly down with the kids while Mike stayed behind to work. All I knew is that the Lord had said, "Nah." I knew I wouldn't get in "trouble" if we went anyway, but I've been walking with the Lord long enough to know that when I get that "feeling" I should respond appropriately. So, the answer was, "Not this year." Until...
"Ali, Gene and I would really like to have you over for dinner sometime. Just to get to know you a little better."
"We would LOVE that. What nights work best for you?"
"Saturday nights are best, but not this Saturday, we're flying to Naples for the day."
"Oh, my Dad has a place there, it's beautiful...you guys will have such a nice time."
"You should come with us, have lunch with your Dad, we'll be back that night."
It never registered with me that my friend was serious, but I declined because "something in my spirit" just told me it wasn't wise, and that we should wait until next year. As we got into the van to go home (we were in our church library having this conversation) I said, "I wonder how they are going for the day?" Mike said, "Babe, he's a pilot and has his own plane, she probably meant what she said." AHHHH!!!! You mean that God would make a way for me to visit my Dad??? Yes, that is exactly what happened.
To make a long story short, my friend was serious about me flying down with them, having lunch with my Dad and Pam, and then coming home that evening. I was shocked! God has provided for me in great ways ever since I've known Him (and even before then!), but this has probably been my favorite way. You see, I stopped visiting my Dad during my summers in college due to mission trips. As soon as I graduated from college, I became Mrs. Wessner and from then on I haven't visited by myself. I've missed Dad.
As I was trying to figure out why God had nudged me to decline a trip with the kids, it never dawned on me that He was orchestrating a trip that would be so much sweeter. The trip down was full of precious fellowship with new friends that have been walking with God longer and more passionately that I have. Lunch with Dad and Pam was overlooking the bay with a sweet smelling breeze tickling my nose. The food was delicious, but it was wonderful to be with Dad and Pam, by myself, for the first time in a long time. We did a bit of shopping and I got to be an only child for a day! Dad said that was what the day was about, letting me see what it is like to be an only child! We laughed...but I liked it! I love being a part of a big family, but I really enjoyed the time alone.
We are members of a large body. However, I don't know that any of us spend enough time with our Father. That day was a reminder of how good it feels to be a child, in the presence of my Dad.
"For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, 'Abba, Father.' " Romans 8:15