"Wow, that car is really fast isn't it, Mom?"
"It sure is, baby. I wonder where they are going in such a hurry?" We were on our way home from Waffle House, I know, I only feed my kids the finest! In any event, we were on our way home and the car next to us was trying to take my Caravan on! I totally let him win because it's not Christian-like to show off (I just laughed out loud...is that LOL? I did it again...). So, this is the sweet conversation that ensued.
"He's not as fast as Jesus." states Miss Julia.
"No? You think Jesus is fast?"
"Yup." She's convinced that it's Jesus that is faster than a speeding bullet...and that Explorer.
"Well, sometimes he's fast." I said, thinking of all of the prayers that Jesus had answered immediately. Like my desire to be a mother and then all of the prayers I prayed because I was a mother. Those little prayers like, "Jesus, please don't let them fall out of the grocery cart like the Wal-Mart greeter said they would." or, "Jesus, please let them stay dry while they are sitting on my friend's new sofa." "Jesus, please give me wisdom in abundance as I lead my children today." You get the picture, you know the prayers.
Then my little Julia said, "Sometimes He's slow." She picked up on my tone I suppose. "Yeah," I smiled, "sometimes He's slow." I thought of the other prayers. The prayers of healing when my baby Julia was on IV antibiotics for 4 weeks and then another 2 weeks of making sure she had it every 8 hours. I don't remember breathing during that time. Then there was the time we spent waiting on my husband to get a job that he loved. Or the prayers when we were waiting on the money (usually $600.00) to make it through the month. You know how they go, "Lord, I need you to move soon. I'm running low on what it takes to trust you. Please give me grace to wait." Then sometimes they are a little more honest, "Hello!!! God, I know you have alot going on, but COME ON!!!"
There was a voice from the back that had been taking all of this in, "And sometimes it's like He's not moving at all." I almost cried. Isn't that the truth. Sometimes it's like He's not moving at all. That is the hardest isn't it?
I have experienced God in some beautiful places. I had the privilege of leading women to Lord while in Africa. I stood in awe under the night sky of the Kalahari Desert. I've watched lives be restored by the power of the Gospel, mine included. Yet there are times when our prayers seem to be more like boomerangs than kites. They seem to come right back at us rather than rising above our circumstances and falling on the ears of the Almighty.
So, what do we do? A woman in my Bible Study puts it beautifully. She says you've got to dig your heals in and have stubborn faith. I suppose that's the kind of faith that says, "I will not be moved! The Lord is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Psalm 73:26. It's the kind of faith that is not easily persuaded. It's the kind that shouts out that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:38-39) It's faith that chooses to believe that even when it feels that the Good Shepherd has left us to fend for ourselves, we will wait to be comforted again by His staff and His rod. It's real faith.
I struggle, I have to be honest, but that conversation refreshed me. He's fast, He's slow, He's still...but He is still my God. He is still in control of the universe. He is still in the business of redemption. He is still worthy of all my praise. Even when He is still. Perhaps when He is still, I should be also, in order to know that He is God. Wherever this finds you, I pray that you will praise Him anyway. If you don't think you can, meditate on the cross. Meditate on the beauty that is found when perfection lays down it's life so that the relationship between God and man can be restored. It's hard, but it's possible. "All things are possible for him who believes. I do believe, help me overcome my unbelief." Mark 9:24...until next time!