I love to eat. So, that hasn't changed. There are many things that have, however. Well, maybe not SO many. The reality of what I am capable of. Today we studied the Israelites and the Tabernacle and so we provided Smore's as the snack. (Since the Israelites were "camping" for 40 years) and the helper tried to pass me some chocolate and I said, "Oh, I wish I could, but..." I didn't feel compelled to take it simply because someone offered it to me. It's such a social thing. Not wanting to hurt someone's feelings. So, there is victory! I'm thankful for that.
On a strangely related note, I saw an old friend tonight and it really impacted me. See, this fast has helped soften my heart. Although it isn't a "spiritual" fast, it is very much turning into one. I realized that I've never not eaten for this long. I've been a believer for 16 years. The Lord has kept me near his wounded side for 16 years and I can't bear the thought of missing a meal. Yet, the thought of slimming down my waistline is good reason to go 10 days without eating. Now, the difference is that I am consuming food, just not in solid form, yet tonight I was convicted and saddened at how little I value the spilled blood. So, where did this come from? My senior year in high school I worked at a daycare here in town. I worked in the after-school room from 3-6:30. I wasn't alone. I worked with a college Sophomore named Stephen. He knew the Lord and he was FUN! I was so surprised during that year that being a Christian could look like the way his life looked. He laughed and sang and was kind. He shared the Gospel with me I'm sure, but more than anything it was his life. Fast forward a few months after my graduation and I came to faith on January 16, 1997. I wanted anything that had to do with Jesus. I would go to Bible studies and weekly meetings, Sunday School and church not to mention any conference! So, Missions conference (at the church where I am currently a member ) rolled around and several folks from my school went and I got to run into Stephen! What a joy! His face looked rather confused and he practically screamed, "What are you doing here!" With great delight I answered right back, "I became a Christian!" He was thrilled. When I went to South Africa I received a support check from him for $73.25. One of my teammates said he was just trying to balance his checkbook, but I knew him better than that. He was reminding me to fix my eyes on Jesus. I may have seen him once or twice after that, always with a sweet brother and sister friendship. He was called to China, I wasn't, so I didn't run into him. He's been home for 6 weeks and shared at church tonight. Isn't that crazy that I go to the church that raised him up! Anyway, seeing him reminded me that I was once lost. Seeing a person that watched me in the wilderness and prayed for me and shared their life with me, it was humbling. I forget, so quickly that I wasn't always here. I didn't always memorize scripture and find solace in knowing that Jesus paid a debt He didn't owe. I take it for granted. I judge very quickly forgetting that it is grace that I know Him and that I recognize His voice. It was good to see Stephen to be reminded that I was lost, and now I'm not.
So, I'm aware, and it's good. I'm grateful that this is doing a greater work in me than simply helping me get to a more desirable weight. So, the third day wasn't hard, necessarily. I asked if I seemed more grumpy than usual and Mike said, "not really." Which I wasn't sure how to take. I wouldn't say that I was overly grumpy, just sinful, really. I was irritated that I had to be in the kitchen while everyone else got to play and it was Sunday and it wasn't fair...just regular toddler stuff. We went to my mother's for the afternoon and took our juices with us and we were pretty glad for the way it worked out. Again, learning how to do this when you aren't always home. They keep for a bit (recommended for up to 2 days, 3 is stretching it) when stored properly. So, we had our snack at Mom's and our supper on the way to church. Now, we are enjoying our dessert. We were supposed to have a carrot something and I vetoed that idea because I wanted a treat. I am thankful to have a "treat." That's something I need to work on and if anyone reading this has an easy healthy treat that satisfies that treat (too bad there isn't a pronoun for treat...I keep using it) craving, please pass it on. I know I'll need some good ideas when this is over and the real part begins! I do feel a little bloated or gassy. I'm just being honest! I've tried to make sure that I have plenty of water, but they say that can happen. So, it is. So, day 3 is supposed to be the worst which is why we started this on a Friday so we could have the weekend together to be miserable, and we weren't so much. I will say that Mike got a pretty intense migraine yesterday that landed him in bed at 7:30 last night. To be fair, I think the real problem was dehydration more than anything because he didn't drink a ton of water and he worked in the jungle that is our yard. So, I think it was coming. I'm glad he was home and could get the rest that he needed. He feels fine today and has, of course, lost more weight than me. He doesn't mind this either, except he was almost willing to eat a plastic french fry that my nephew was serving up! We both agreed that we don't want anything "bad" but rather something fresh and full of flavor. I served the children a pasta salad with sundried tomatoes, olives and feta and almost licked the spoon.
So, now it is time to find my way into bed after this 3rd day of victory. This day of remembrance (sweet that the Lord's Supper was served today, that's a meal I won't miss...unless I'm in sin of course) of how the Lord pulled me out of the mud and mire and put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of of Praise to Him. He can do that for you, too, ya know. It doesn't take much. Admit you can't do it...and that you often times don't want to, and He will rescue you, too. Then everything that you do will be an act of gratitude to the One to whom you owe your very life. So, if this is the life He gave me, I'd like to enjoy it...healthy style.
Thanks for checking in! I'll talk to ya tomorrow at the end of another successful day and maybe I'll even have some pictures!
Sweet Dreams!
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